Gah! I missed my blogiversary.

I had intended to host a virtual fête in honor of my blog’s first birthday, you know, just a frivolous commemoration of all the mental purging I’ve been subjecting you to since February 04, 2006. There was going to be party hats and those little weenies floating in a grape jelly/ketchup sauce too. But I flaked. Rather I’ve been caught up in a domestic cyclone of keeping the oil tank gauge above the ¼ mark, blowing kisses to my family as I dash out the door to night classes, vacuuming up residual plaster dust that seemingly reappears in places I swore I just cleaned and did I mention the vomit? No? Well there was loads of that. Loads and loads of double rinsing and double scoops of tide. And because the snot immediately freezes our noses shut the instant we walk outside, I haven’t let my kids play in the snow for weeks. Which means I’ve been their exclusive source for entertainment and amusement inside the warm house. Turns out I totally kick ass in Nickelodeon Trivial Pursuit. Go on - ask me anything about Jimmy Neutron or the Rugrats. Things may be slowing down however or at least nearing the apex of lunacy, and as nature alleges, calmer days should soon follow.

So let’s have us a party! I’ve been blogging for one year! Have a party favor and a shot of grape juicy juice! And just because I’m a wild and crazy guy, I’ll let you have the first whack at the Jerry Falwell piñata if you can hold the shot glass between your cleavage while reciting Chaucer’s The Canterbury Tale in the proper vernacular. Come on y’all, make Dudley proud. Disclaimer – only two of my readers are actually going to appreciate what the hell I’m blabbering on about.

I’m deliriously tired, so I’m off to crawl into bed with the love of my life and watch Star Trek. Don’t even try to stop me because I’m crazy like that.